Making the Most of Misfortune

I am not brave; I am unfortunate. It’s not the same thing.

Let me explain. I talk a good game about how we should all switch to a new paradigm—one where value is not based on money; where cooperation and sharing resources is the norm; where sharing and caretaking are highly valued. And, for the most part, I walk the talk. I live simply, finding ways to share with others which builds community. I am a skilled and experienced caretaker and I share that with friends, family and community as I am able. I have a blog where I write essays about transformation and the healthier, happier, world we can have if we just make the shift.

Here is the secret: I would sell it all out if someone would just offer me a job. I am that desperate for validation from the very society that I condemn. So, I have been saved from selling out not because I am brave or committed or strong; I have been saved from selling out because no one has hired me. Misfortune has forced me to stay true to my values—living in cooperation, living simply, living through sharing and creativity. Because the truth is that the first thing I think about when a job opening looks especially promising is this: “I can finally have a normal life again!” I think about the things I can afford—a car with a driver’s side door that opens; rent on an place of my own instead of living in one bedroom in someone else’s house and shuffling a portion of my things back and forth from a storage unit; yoga classes, qigong retreats, massage therapy, and other proactive health care; and, to my credit, I also think about the organizations I would be able to donate to.

If I, with my years of polished words and bright, hopeful ideals, cannot find a way to hold true to the dream of a new paradigm except through being forced, then how can I expect others new or newer to the concept to choose abandonment of everything that has represented security and happiness? Having it all—job, house, family, savings, retirement, and opening it all up to transformation—now that would be brave!

Me? I’m just good at making the most of misfortune.